Wednesday, February 11, 2009

F*ck my infidelity

by Angie D.

Last night, to the detriment of my thesis, I discovered an amazing website: If PostSecret and Some E-Cards had a baby, it would be this delightful dose of Schadenfreude and comic relief. People from around the world send in juicy, horrific, or revolting tidbits explaining why their lives suck, and then proclaim "FML," shorthand for F*** My Life.

While reading, I stumbled across gems that reminded of times I have felt a similar need to scream profanities and point out life's unfair ironies:

"Today, I cut myself of a bandaid box, while trying to get a bandaid out for another cut. FML"

"Today, I was in the car with a group of my girl friends discussing sexual experiences when I looked down and realized my Blackberry had dialed the family I babysit for and had left a five minute voicemail. FML"

It seems clear there is some catharsis in sharing these F*** My Life experiences and there is certainly humor (if not healing) to be gained from reading them.

Yet as I kept going, I noticed a striking number of FMLs reported incidents of infidelity. I'm curious, is the standard response to finding out you've been cheated on (or finding out you've been caught), to throw up one's hands and proclaim F*** My Life and then share the story with thousands of websurfers? And is it enjoyable for readers to gawk at the misdeeds and failed relationships of others?

"Today, I texted my boyfriend saying hi. His response, "I got your best friend pregnant". FML"

"Today, my wife left me the following voicemail: "Alex, last night was amazing. You took me to places I've never been to before. I can't wait to see you tonight after work." My name is Rob. We haven't had sex in two years. FML"

"Today, my fiance told me that he no longer loves me, that he still has feelings for an ex. The wedding is off and he needs to the ring back to give to the right woman. FML"

"Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML"

I can't deny that I love the forum. And its anonymous format probably provides posters with a needed outlet for frustration, while allowing readers to indulge in the type of voyeurism that affirms "my life isn't so bad… and if it is, at least 38, 914 people's lives suck too." (Number is made up.) But it's still a little worrying that infidelity and is portrayed as humorous. And that the perpetrators of infidelity (those who are cheating on their significant others) feel self-pity (insinuated by "FML") upon being caught. It's unclear whose side the reader is supposed to be on. And it's upsetting that such disrespect of one's partner is flaunted so cavalierly. Unfortunately, I say that even as I chuckle (guiltily) at:

"Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend. When she asked me to pick up her thong from behind my bed I realized there were two. I didn't pick up hers. FML"


At February 11, 2009 at 8:59 PM , Blogger Robert McGibbon said...

my favorite:

"Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone pulled the fire alarm, and my boyfriend couldn't find the key. So he left me, and the Resident Advisor found me. The fireman had to cut the chain. FML"


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