Saturday, February 7, 2009

Anti-feminist women?

by Elizabeth Winkler

Someone recently played “Dirty Song” by the band Cars Can Be Blue for me, with the obvious intention of offending my feminist sensibilities. I won’t copy all the lyrics, but here are a few of the more repulsive lines to give you a taste:

“You can sodomize me
Get behind and ride me
Stuff your cock inside me
Proceed to fuck me blindly…

I will suck you off
Choke me with your cock
Blow it on my face
Your load I want to taste”

My point in mentioning this song (by a band that I’ve been told is relatively popular), is not to decry all the nasty, misogynistic strains in the musical world – that would be quite a never-ending project – but to point to the problem of women who themselves dispense quite a load of woman-hating into an already patriarchal society: this song is performed by a woman, who in her tone of voice, seems to express quite a zeal for being “choked with your cock.” It seems to me one thing for a woman to be pro-life (which of course, many feminists argue is anti-woman), and quite another to actually romanticize, glorify and make a catchy song out of violent sex/rape.

But the problem of the feminist-hating female is not new: girls who are happy to be objectified and degraded, thrilled with porn-star fame, eager to claim that feminists are just ‘ugly bitches’ etc. have always plagued the feminist movement. But how do we address them? Is it their feminist prerogative, their “choice” to reject attempts at equality? We certainly can’t make them want to be ‘liberated.’ Is it ok if a girl loves being a porn star, or if she truly believes that her only place is in the home?

What does the women’s movement do with women who have no desire to move forward?


At February 8, 2009 at 10:47 AM , Blogger Courtny said...

I totally disagree with you that this song is misogynistic and woman-hating. It's not about rape. This is a song sung by a woman who knows what she wants sexually from a guy and is speaking out! Rough/violent sex can be totally consensual. Look at the rest of the lyrics:

You might think I'm dirty if I let you have your way
That's the way that boys and girls have been raised to play

If you can't control yourself in saying something more
I can think of things to do with that mouth of yours

You can eat me out
With that dirty mouth
Throw me on the couch
Do it then get out...

We don't have to do anything if you don't want
We can just look into each other's eyes
And masturbate


This song is all about her aggressively pursuing this guy sexually. She knows what she wants and is expressing her desires even though he might think she's dirty.
I don't like the fact that she assumes the guy will want to have his way with her, but I do like that she encompasses all different types of sex. She's talking about HIS boundaries and saying she won't cross them. This song isn't about rape at all. I say rock on, Cars Can Be Blue singer!

At February 8, 2009 at 12:20 PM , Anonymous Emily Rutherford said...

I'm not familiar with this song or this band, but on the face of it I don't think we can necessarily assume that a woman who sings a song about violent sex is self-hating or anti-woman or anti-feminist. Many women engage in seemingly "violent" sex consensually and even as a feminist action. It is possible to divorce such desires from the patriarchy--see for more.


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